Now With Even More MSG!

I haven't made any resolutions yet. I meant too... but haven't got around to it yet. I know you expect me to make a resolution to quit procrastinating but I refuse. In fact I resolve to procrastinate more than ever! I intend to procrastinate even when I feel like doing something immediately. I also resolve to watch more TV. Actually I just plan on having the TV on more. Maybe I'll leave it on all night. I wonder what the world record is for having the TV on is? Does it count if you're gone while it's on? I want to be patriotic and have it on all the time. I won't watch MS NBC unless I'm at home. While I'm gone I'll put it on Fox News. The thought police will never figure out that I'm a Communist! Well not really, I'm a Marxist of the Grouch variety though. I like the Occupy Movement except for the fact that they identify themselves with 99% of the population. I don't think I fit in that well. Maybe I'm just being arrogant.

I was thinking the other day after eating Chinese food, that fortune cookie fortunes are way too prosaic. I know the joke about the fortune that reads "Help I'm being held prisoner in a fortune cookie factory!" I started thinking there could be better ironic fortunes or ominous fortunes. My typical faux fortune is "You'll be dead by Tuesday," some people fail to see the humor in that but I think it's hilarious! The other day I decided "You will be hungry again in an hour," would make a good fortune. I guess "You will experience explosive diarrhea!" might be over the line. Of course some fortune cookies don't even pretend at prescience they just offer tepid moral advice. I would like to read Supreme Court decisions from slips in fortune cookies you know bullshit stuff like "Corporations are people too," or "Limiting money violates a corporation's right to speak," I think putting those on fortune cookie fortunes would give them their proper gravitas.

Pretty soon I should have a video uploaded to You Tube, I will post it to this page when it's ready! It's all part of my strategy and ambition to spend my life lying on the beach. I figure somehow between painting and writing and videoing I will somehow manage to live off my talents. This is really my resolve. I will probably achieve it on December 20th of this year. What the hell I will enjoy it all day long! Hey one cool thing about procrastinating this year is if you put off Christmas shopping until December 22nd you might not have to do it at all! Oh well, Happy New Year anyway it could be your last! Now there's a shitty fortune cookie fortune!



Russell